Skip to content

The Five Stages of Forgiveness in the Workplace

December 18, 2012

TimMiller_sunraysroad_squareIt’s not until you’ve been royally screwed over by someone at work that you realize how impossible it is to forgive.

As good Christians, we believe it is our duty to rush headlong into forgiveness the moment we have been trespassed against, as Jesus modeled for us in the gospels. However, in real life, it seems as if we are wired instinctively to do the opposite of forgiveness — especially in workplace settings, where paranoia and competition run rampant.

Our first impulse is more likely to hold a grudge, or to get sweet revenge, or to spread malicious gossip, rather than heaping up loving kindness upon the enemy.

Those feelings of hurt and retaliation run strong, and we instinctively take action to protect ourselves.  But Jesus seems to really harp on this subject quite a bit. The gospels are filled with teachings about turning the other check, and praying for your enemies, and walking the extra mile.

It’s just hard, and we may not like it very much. Especially if we have to repeatedly see that scoundrel at the office every day. The point is, though, if we really want to follow Jesus, we must get over our shallow-headed spiritual resistance and face the act of forgiving head-on.

I have found that forgiveness is a gradual process. It’s like throwing your feelings and your spiritual life and your perpetrator all into a slow cooker: sometimes it takes a while until it’s done, even if all the essential ingredients are right there. Here are five distinct stages of forgiveness. Well, at least this is how it works for me.

Click here to read the rest of this post at The High Calling and get to those famous Five Stages of Forgiveness!

About these ads
3 Comments leave one →
  1. December 18, 2012 11:23 am

    “I have found that forgiveness is a gradual process. It’s like throwing your feelings and your spiritual life and your perpetrator all into a slow cooker: sometimes it takes a while until it’s done, even if all the essential ingredients are right there.”

    stew (v.)
    c.1400, “to bathe in a steam bath,”…

    stew (n.)
    c.1300, “vessel for cooking,” …

    cheek it out, man.

  2. December 19, 2012 3:37 pm

    I just got chewed out today — all over some good natured fun. So, forgiveness, as opposed to revenge, is a little tough. Timely message bro

  3. December 22, 2012 7:08 pm

    It has been more than three years since I was laid off in the aftermath of what I perceived as injustice. Three years of productive work since then have cooled some of the anger. I have tried to forgive guys who deprecated my work to cover the flaws in theirs. But, I think there have to be better ways to get work done than the methods generally used to run organizations. On Labor Day a year and some months nearer to the events, I wrote a piece that was my state of mind then: http://working-dangerously.blogspot.com/2011/09/labor-day-two-years-after-being-laid.html
    I started reading this blog during the time I was looking for perspective. There are some people in this network who will face up to the systemic injustices in business. Not everybody runs for cover.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 2,582 other followers

%d bloggers like this: